Monday, May 31, 2010

Optional Essay Question

I’m not embarrassed to admit that watching a bunch of overpaid actors in “Valentine’s Day” got me in the mood. It may not be a porno or even an erotic movie, but it had me thinking how much I would like to have a hardcore make out session with Anne Hathaway *ahem* I meant Ashton Kutcher, of course… And, since I don’t have any kind of companionship lately and my vibrator just run out of batteries I have to focus that energy into something else. So, I’m switching to a nostalgic mood, just like that.

I’ve wanted to write about my college years here, for a while now. Somehow I couldn’t come up with something other than: Look how well I pull off the construction look!!


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Now, I realize I shouldn’t focus on college itself, since it wasn’t the homework, projects or classes that made these years so amazing… It was the people (Big “aww!” please!)

I shouldn’t even bother writing a corny entry, since it isn’t a corny generation. I don’t know if it’s the time and age, but I would define my classmates as… Attention whores, each one in their own way.

(While I try to describe each kind, keep in mind I don’t have any plans to pursue the comedic path, I’m aware of my limitations)

Hippie Girl. If it was up to her, the whole career would be about explaining how she designed the building based on peaceful thoughts.

Inappropriate Guy. “Penis! Are you, people, listening to me? I said penis! Vagina! Now I said Vagina! Penis in Vagina! Sex! Sex! TWO GIRLS ONE CUP!”

AlwaysRight Girl. And if she isn’t, she’ll throw a fit so the universe change its course and she’ll be right again.

TooGoodForYouFuckers Guy. He likes to think of himself as an already graduated student who’s doing the rest of us a favor by showing up to classes. I see very kinky sex between him and AlwaysRight Girl.

IWillJustThrowRandomComments Girl. “Have I told you I’m going to marry a Colombian? I would but I hate being so fat! I’m a virgin, if you were wondering; and I’d kill for sushi right now… Aren't you worried about skin cancer?”.

Alternative Guy. I know this is a phase most teenagers go through… But he’s already 20, you’d think he’d be done with telling people how cool he is for liking Alice in Wonderland before it became mainstream.

TooGayToFunction Guy. If I said that I’d love him even more if he stopped complaining about how his Burberry wallet and Prada cell phone were so last season I’d be lying.

Perfect Guy. He’s hot and a gentleman, every girl in my class has a crush on him. I would too if I didn’t have the feeling he has a thing with the TooGaytoFunction Guy.

CompletePackage Girl. The female version of the guy above. Pretty, nice, smart, big boobs… What keeps her from being the Perfect Girl? Unlike her male version, she’s into the opposite sex.

HardWorker Guy. I have nothing but respect for a guy who is majoring in two things.

YoYoMothaFocka Guy. Oh man, this whitey sure loves actig like a nigga.

I’m missing a bunch others (who are equally fascinating… I’m just lazy), including me. I’m an attention whore, just like the others, I just don’t know which kind. I’m rooting for the:

LooksGreatWhenShePretendsToBeAConstructionWorker Girl.


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

(And if you turn your head a bit to the right you may get to meet the TooGoodForYouFuckers Guy).

I said it before, I can’t come up with something corny to say about these people. I will, however, say this: Just the way they are, each and every single one of them is fucking awesome. I just hope I have attention-whored myself enough so they’ll miss me as much as I’ll miss them.

Friday, May 28, 2010

You're Coming Pretty Close to Doing it

Little update… No, no, it’s actually a big one.

I just bought my ticket to Spain!

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

I’m leaving on July, 30. I’ll stop at Mexico City, waiting just 3 hours for the next flight (after having been on an airport for 10 hours, 3 hours is my definition of awesome), blah, blah, blah, I’ll arrive in Madrid the very next morning. The End.

Hopefully I’ll be too busy being scared out of my mind, that I won’t notice it’s such a long boring trip.

Oh, I almost forgot to say something… YAY!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Keeps Me from Getting Bored

I don’t know if I should say I have updates or just random thoughts… And now, I don’t know if there’s actually a difference between the two. Screw this, it’s 1am: I have something to say.


. I have the house all to myself this week! In 20 years of life I’ve never been home alone before. I guess it’s way to prepare myself for life in Spain… And to PARTYYYYYYYYY!!!

(Naaah… I’m too big of a nerd to do something like that).

. Spain plans are going smooth. Well, at least the papers I need. I already have my curriculum with all the classes I have taken, all signed and everything. That excites me, ok!?

. The other day I went to see my gynecologist for a regular check up (long live the internet who lets me share these kind of things with strangers) and guess who I saw… My 6th grade crush; who, a couple of weeks ago, I found out impregnated a girl. Oh dear boy o’ mine, don’t you know this would have never happened with me? I’m a pro at putting on condoms (I could almost hear my mom saying “that’s my girl!”).

. My beautiful blog just reached 20,000 views. Big fucking yay! It’s a big deal to me… So all jokes a side (I can do that), thanks a freaking zillion to every single person who has ever read me, and special thanks to the people who took some time of their life to write a comment.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Make it Very Dry, and No Olive

Somehow, I lack the creativity to write this entry… I’ll just say this like it is, and you can add some funny accent, yes?

Saturday night was so fucked up, dude!

Regularly, I don’t write about my social life. I tell myself it doesn’t add anything to the main objective of this blog, but the real reason is … I just don’t have any.

Even though I’m Miss Party-Girl to you, now; I’m still true to my principles. This does has something to do with the point of my blog. The party was, amongst other things (like, birthday party, end-of-the-semester party, let’s-get-really-drunk party), my going away party.

I really don’t know what to say about it, though. A lot of shit happened, funny, exciting, weird… But I’m guessing it’s the kind of things you have to be there, or at least know the people.

Ok, ok. I do have a couple of statements:

. I <3 Jelly Shots (and I feel I shouldn’t be this proud of saying it just like that).

. Real fun doesn’t start until you’re thrown in to a pool against your will… And I’m not even being sarcastic.


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

The truth is… I will miss these people like crazy.

The second truth is that I should receive a medal (or a set of applauses, at least) for having the balls to upload pictures of myself not only when I’m sleep-deprived, also when I’m wet and drunk (…dirty!).

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Adding to the weirdness of the night and without getting into gruesome details, I have to say I learned something important: You don’t need Europe to try those things you see on French movies.

Friday, May 14, 2010

She's Only a Little Child

Remember what I told you, honey bees, about my super-duper new camera?

If you don’t, you can read it here... or I could simply spoil it for you: It’s waterproof (yay!).

Well, a couple of days ago my baby lost its water-virginity. I was hanging out with a group of friends, and one of them said “you should have done this from the start” and sank the poor thing into a glass of water. It was almost pornographic.

This is the result:


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

If it wasn't such a blurry picture you could’ve seen my eyes in terror at the image of my camera being raped.

Somehow I managed to make this entry about my waterproof camera sound dirty. I have a talent for these kind of things.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Coffee, Gentlemen, Finally

I was hoping last text would be the only Complaining-About-Staying-Up-All-Night-Working post I’d have to write in a long time… Or at least within the same week.

No need for an intro anymore, right? Let’s just cut down to the chase.

The final assignment for my Construction Technologies class was to build a model with ‘real materials’. My team chose Tadao Ando’s Church of Light thinking “it’s a simple structure”; well, it turns out, we’re a bunch of idiots.

I’m going to shorten up a boring story by telling you that getting together with five other people for almost six straight days wasn’t enough to get the work done, three of us had to spend a whole night in my house (backyard, to be more specific) finishing the stupid thing (I know, it’s not the church’s fault… But let me call it stupid just this once).

This time I don’t have pictures that show the different stages we went through that night… I just have pretty pictures (insert a couple of giggles here).


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

There’s absolutely nothing interesting going on in this photo… I just upload it because it’s the only one I have where I’m actually working. It proves it wasn’t a voluntary (and weird) sleepover.


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

The only thing this photograph proves is that I like to take pictures of guys’ butts when I think they’re not watching, and that I’m obviously bad at it.


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

There aren’t any pictures of me sleeping in a weird place since I didn’t sleep at all that night. Really. It’s just sad.

Still, he should be honored; he’s the first guy I spent the night with since I broke up… Bad joke? I don’t even know anymore.


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Jealous of not having the ability of sleeping on the floor or on my own hand, I got all the enjoyment I needed by taking pictures of the people who could.


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

This adds nothing… I just thought my baby looked disgustingly cute.

This story has a happy ending. Even though we ARE idiots, we are the kind of idiots who build awesome churches.

Ladies and Gentlemen let me introduce you to the fruit of my loins:


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

If that photo didn't make you go all I.Have.To.Marry.This.Girl.Now (or you’re the artistic kind) maybe this one will do the trick:


Image and video hosting by TinyPic

I know I’ll be carrying pictures of this baby in my wallet for years ahead.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

You Can't Ever Find a Place that's Nice and Peaceful

My blog’s theme is something like “Hey, I’m going to Spain someday… Meanwhile! Read about my life as an architecture student who complains a lot”. Well, I’ve been given the chance to complain a big deal and be sure I’ll use it. Right about… Now!

We were told about a project on Friday at 11am, which we had to hand in at that same hour… on Saturday. You know what it means, right? I had to spend my Friday night on Campus… Working. Without any kind of sleep.

Don’t get me wrong. It was a horrible experience; long, frustrating and beautyless (sleeping does it for me, ok?). But it was, I’ll admit it, interesting. Now that it’s over, I’m glad I did it, especially because I now have something to blog about.

Pictures are the way to go here.
Image and video hosting by TinyPic
3:04AM: Time when I fully comprehend the fact that I was spending a whole night at school… So, I did the logical thing: I grabbed a piece of fabric and pretended it was a “wedding thong”.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
3:08AM: I pulled my shit together and I decided to keep doing my work… Just trust me on this one, even if the picture shows me on Facebook and msn.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
4:11AM: This was actually a nice moment right there. My friend was on the phone with her “one-night-stand”… I could hear him say she “smelled great”. You would think that’d make me feel uncomfortable. It didn’t.

(Oh, and please remember what I told you. Sleep does it for me…).

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
7:56AM: Exactly what it looks like.

It was around that time when I pulled some philosophical crap: “Light keeps us from perfection”. Of course I was talking about how hard was to sleep with the lights on… But it sounds really deep and smart, don’t you think?

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
8:29AM: At that moment I actually considered marrying coffee, and having a really kinky honeymoon.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
11:10AM: A friend captured the moment of “FUCK EVERYTHING! I WANT TO BE A UNICORN!”

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
11:47PM: …To be young and beautiful… After a bunch of bitching I decided I’ll sleep when I’m dead.