I feel like embarrassing myself today (random need I have from time to time), and talking about my undying love for my brother’s roommate is the fastest way to reach my goal.
I’m not going to talk about his dreamy blue eyes, his tanned perfect skin, his wavy brown hair or his amazing abs that he likes to show off walking shirtless around the apartment… I’m sorry, why am I not talking about this? Pff… I knew I should had made and erotic blog. Ok! Who’s in the mood for a very explicit story about me giving this really sexy guy a blow-
Tonight’s show has been interrupted to inform you all I just reached my just mentioned goal (and a couple other things too)!
Well, I’m not going to talk about his girlfriend either (ugh…), or about her annoying (but pretty cool) 60’s dresses… Or her great taste in movies, music (and guys) that make it really hard for me to dislike her.
Nope. I’m going to talk about
me, since that’s the thing I do best being incapable of talking to him without sounding like a complete retard.
Me: Hi! How you doing?
Him: Great, how about you?
Me: Great! How about you… I just asked you, right?
Me: Ok, then.
But, I’m proud to announce that he isn’t the sharpest tool either when he talks to me.
Him: (holding a bottle of sunscreen SPF50) Is this yours?
Him: You need to put this on…? I’m sorry…
Me: I don’t need your pity, mister.
Him: No, no! I didn’t mean it like that… I was just thinking about the need girls have to get tanned- I really don’t understand it really, it’s ridiculous- not that they can’t look good- I mean… Forget it.
Can you imagine our children? They wouldn’t know what a proper conversation is.
In other embarrassing news… I decided to create a Tumblr account. I would be ashamed if I weren’t having so much fun with it.