“no sex.no drugs.no wine.no
no fun.no sin.no you.no wonder it's dark”
I should add “no reason to blog”.
There was no need to come up with an original introduction for this entry; those lyrics describe my life so perfectly now that I have final exams starting in less than a week.
My days have been reduced to: study/kill the few neurons I’ve left on the internet/eat/poop... Notice I didn’t mention “fuck”. I’m worrying for sanity, here. No matter how much effort my vibrator puts into it (and the poor thing is risking the chance of overheating), it doesn’t seem to be enough.
If TV shows have taught me something is that a girl can fix all her problems
getting drunk having a cute boyfriend with a nice girly chat. I thought I could count on my friend, Grey, with this; she, after all, got that lousy nickname from Grey’s Anatomy; for being such a horny med student. I was so wrong about everything that I already decided it’s going straight to my biography.
“I need to get laid” I confessed while Grey and I hung out in her bedroom. I laughed but I was being deadly serious “I swear I can’t think of anything but sex… And it’s not exactly convenient, you know? Everything makes me horny… “ I stopped abruptly; Grey’s eyes were piercing into my soul “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“I just realized I’m definitely not a lesbian” She answered, as if it was something to be proud about “Here I am, with such an easy opportunity to fuck you and I can honestly say I don’t want to”.
I slammed the door on my way out so hard a moody teenager would be proud.
I don’t know where she got her Friendship Manual but I didn’t feel a bit comforted after hearing how unfuckable I am.
Shallow college girl in search for an attractive
23 year old guy with a sense of humor
and flexible hours.
No experience required.