My best friend and I never agree on guys, which makes it pretty damn easy to stay true to our “Hoes before Bros” philosophy.
I don’t even try arguing with her because, on some level, I’m aware her guys are better looking than mine. She’s really into pretty little guys with six packs who only exist at Abercrombie & Fitch; even though I can’t deny these guys are the closest to heaven that I’ll ever be ♫, they do nothing for me. If I wanted pretty, I’d be licking pussy… My guys have to be rough around the edges; there must be something awkward about them.
The guy with the girlfriend, Judas, the one I
like liked like liked, falls into the “pretty” category. His soft clear skin, greenish almond shaped eyes and perfect white smile make him so delicate looking he almost gives the impression of being a little boy. I didn’t think much of him when we first met, it wasn’t until we talked for a while (and he defended me against Dude’s childish actions) when I became interested.
My relationship with the Cute Guy from my classes was far more animalistic. There’s really nothing to say about his appearance, he’s average. Average height, average weight, dark eyes, dark hair and still, from the first time I saw him, entering my classroom, I thought “fuck, this guy is so hot”.
Making out with him hasn’t calmed my sexual needs at all, neither did the fact that his not-so-close shave left the skin around my mouth sore for three days. Biology takes over me every time I see him in the hallways; I don’t care whether he’s a Sagittarius or if he likes to feed hungry puppies on his free time (no, ok, I’d care about the puppies), I just keep thinking what an amazing set of kids we would have. I swear I rarely ever feel this mating necessity so badly. Of course I don’t mean I want to become a 21 year old mother, I just want to do it like mammals do on the Discovery Channel ♫.
Either I come up with a casual and not at all desperate way to get him into bed or with a good explanation for why was I humping his leg.