Saturday, August 25, 2012

If a Body Catch a Body

From my last blog entry, you might have gotten the impression I just love sitting here doing nothing but judge people I know. That’s not true. I also love judging people I don’t know.

There’s this blog (which I’m not giving its name because I dread to think you’d use your internet connection on something other than reading me), it’s run by a couple, a guy and a girl in a D/s relationship. I follow a few more blogs like that one, but written by people older than I am and much more skilled on the issue. These two are much more relatable, specially her, being around my age, fairly inexperienced and with a bit of a smart mouth.  Just a few days ago, the guy –or the Dominant- shocked me by posting his decision on renting “his pet”. Through an agreement, people would have a chance to screw the girl. It’s not the first time I’ve heard this. It is a relatively common practice (or that’s what my research says). People do it and that’s awesome; I just wasn't expecting it from someone similar to me.

British Man and I have discussed it. I’m not into being shared around men and he’s not into sharing me with other men… It was a short discussion, as you can see.

When I was a teenager, it used to be a bit of a fantasy to be with a number of guys at the same time. As I grew it, the fantasy has been diminishing until now, it has completely disappeared. I keep wondering why, specially since I have no problem fooling around with girls.

I’m sure that admitting men and women are different is the first step I have to take to solve this dilemma (ah! If all dilemmas revolved around hooking, either, with a bunch of guys or a bunch of girls… That’s the world John Lennon truly imagined). We are different. We are both awesome, but in our own way… And there’s no need to send any gender to Mars. Just saying.

Being with a woman would be like being with someone similar to me. Next to British Man she would stand as a completely different individual, with different things to offer and different (my thesaurus couldn’t find a better word either) ways of seeking pleasure. It would be easy for me to see her as a complement, regardless if she’s a sub, a Dom or a goddam astronaut.

A guy or guys would be another deal. While I do think my British Man is a special snowflake, to share the spotlight with others “like him” would compromise this all-mighty figure I have of him…Ok. Let’s start this over.

Hi! I’m Lola and I love sex. I also love reading about sex. From my research, I have gathered that this “sharing the sub” act has quite a romantic meaning (not one I’d share when my friends are arguing which Nicholas Sparks novels is the cutest). See, you really don’t own something until you’re able to share it. This is a level of ownership, both, Dom and sub crave for. I understand this and I truly believe it’s beautiful in a way.

The whole BDSM community is very complex to me. The more I read about it, the more I feel I don’t know a thing. However, like everything else in this world, it can be reduced to this: do whatever the fuck you want. It’s about having fun, being comfortable, feeling fulfilled, not raping or murdering anybody, and putting the label you want to it.

I’d love to please my Sir by fucking other girls; I wouldn’t enjoy it if he asked me to do the same thing with guys. I could put it in fancier words but I’m not a fancy person; it’s as simple as this: I feel owned and appreciated by my Sir when he doesn’t want any cock but his own to benefit directly from my work.


  1. I don't think "renting" someone can co-exist with caring for someone. I mean I have seen how most people take care of the things they rent. I would not trust someone I cared about to be "rented" by someone else.

    I could go much farther into the physiological issues that lead and result from such actions, but the statement above is basically a good summary.

    P.S. Good to see you back, I hope you had a good summer.

    1. I can’t say I agree. It’s not something one person forces another one to do (or at least, it shouldn’t be). Some couples are, both, really into it and enjoy it. For what I know and as in any other practice in the relationship, they talk about it first, are aware of their limits and of course, take proper precautions.
      I guess it’s something hard to understand for us. I assume you wouldn’t want to watch your wife with someone else, and I’m like you. Other people, however, really get their kicks out of it, and as long as it involves consenting adults, why not?

    2. Sorry, I really did not want to right out a whole page on the matter, but I do agree with you, even if it might not have come across as that way. (I'll try to keep this short)

      My opinion is there are two groups is the Sub/Dom world; those who are in a committed relationship and practice a Sub/Dom relationship to explore there sexual freedoms. The other group are people practice the Sub/Dom as a life style, which is mutually exclusive from a committed relationship.

      That being stated I feel like those who practice it as a life style tend to be freer with exploring things like "renting" and group sex, because they lack the bonds of a committed relationship. I mean there still must be trust and a bond between a Sub and Dom, but it's different relationship from those who are a couple and those who see it as a life style. Does this makes sense?

      Anyway, my point is that the act of "renting" would be very straining on a relationship for couple who use the Sub/Dom to explore sexual freedoms and desires. I would question a couple in a relationship if they started this practice, because what starts out as couple exploring their sexual freedom can develop into one person developing a full blown life style choice of Sub/Dom world. This may effect their relationship as a couple if their bond becomes strained due to such practices. At what point does the relationship go from a couple practicing a Sub/Dom for fun and two individuals practicing Sub/Dom as a life-style? I know this is a large gray area and that I have basically oversimplified the situation to make my point, but at least I clarified my position.

      I would just like to add that I have no where near the experience with the Sub/Dom world as you, so feel free to say I am completely off base if that's the case. Also, sorry for the short novel, I told you it would not be a short explanation.

    3. Okay so I understood the part where you differentiated those two different kinds of relationships, and I think I agree. There are people who have a dominant/submissive just because they crave this lifestyle; they don’t need to be in a loving relationship. However, one thing doesn’t take out the other. Some people might not be in love but others can be in love with the scene, practice it 24/7 and be in love with the person they practice it with too… It’s more to them than just a fun thing during sex. It’s just a different view on what a “committed relationship” means.